PokeDopes
by Talon Dragonborn
Summary: Join us as we tour the fair town of Fishville and watch as we all live in harmony...or not, from the shenanigans you'll see.


**PokeDopes**

**By: Talon Dragonborn (Tohru) and SaintNothin**

* * *

Disclaimer: Neither Saint or I own Pokemon or any trademarks of Nintendo. The OCs and story belong to both Saint and I, cept the names.

Authors Notes: Hello guys, here comes a collaborative story between myself and an IRC bro by the name of SaintNothin. Originally this started out as a joke but eventually became a full time story, written about our special community...only as Pokemon. I won't say what this community is, but if the names seem familiar then you should know anyways. Also, if the plot seems sort of familiar, then yes it is exactly what you think it is only with our own personal flair. Alright then, lets get the show on the road!

Rated M for later chapters. This will become lemon flavor as it goes on so just to warn you. I will mark the chapter with a warning if lemons do appear so don't worry of lemons randomly popping up without warning. Without further adieu, the story.

"This indicates a spoken sentence". "_This indicates thought_". There will be no Pokespeak.

Summary: Join us as we tour the fair town of Fishville and watch as we all live in harmony...or not, from the shenanigans you'll see.

* * *

It was a nice day in Fishville as a lone Zuruzukin left his lowly hovel in the ghettos. He locked the door behind him...not that it would do any good with the way some of the Ludicolo pick locks and steal shit, though he doesn't really have anything worth stealing. He continued on his way down the street to meet with his homies, keeping an eye out around him for any dangers. Muggings and the like were common around here, so one had to be aware of everything that goes on. A few gangsters waved at him on his way but he just kept on walkin like a boss.

Once he met up with them outside of an old abandoned shack, that's when the real fun would start. They planned to head up to the nicer parts of town and rob one of the convienient stores that dotted the middle sector.

"Lets go over the plan again faggots," the Zuruzuken said to the others, "We go in, hit the cash register, then jet with the dosh and some snacks."

"God dammit Slash-Caps," one of the whinier ballas said, calling the Zuruzukin by his nickname, "What do we do if the cops show or the pussies at the store fight back? I ain't gonna jail for you bro."

"Then we either wreck dem niggas or cheese it," Slash-Caps said, slapping the whinner upside the head, "Its so easy even a balla like you can get it."

They went over the plan one more time before they departed on their way. It was gonna get intense if the local fuzz get involved, but they were pretty confident that they could pull it off. Maybe they could finally pay off them hoes with this...

Meanwhile, at the convience store, Cubone stood by her lonesome at the counter, waiting for her lazy co-worker to show up to the job that morning. As usual he was late while she was perfectly on time.

"Geez where is he?" She pondered to herself out loud, leaning on counter as she stared at the door, waiting for a customer or her co-worker.

Suddenly, the door opened and a Rattata walked in. He seemed rather calm though he had a sort of swagger to him that indicated his true nature. Casually, he approached the magazine rack and plucked a random one before opening it and flipping through the pages with no particular aim to read it. Cubone saw this and tapped her foot on the floor repeatedly. It bugged her that he always did this, every time he came into the store. She rolled her eyes, letting out a small exasperated sigh.

"Hey, Tohru," she called, stating his nickname "can you...like get to work?" She asked, staring daggers at the Pokemon.

"If I feel like it today Saint," Tohru said to the Cubone, using her nick, "I had a tough walk getting here. A Pelipiper ate my breakfast and ran away. Had to stop at the local Burger Empoleon to pick up more...but I realized that I forgot my wallet. Walked back, then when I went to order they-"

"Yeah, yeah. I hear this story EVERY morning. Why don't you make up something new? A Pelipiper? Please you could rip it to shreds." Saint shook her head in dissapointment.

"Ok then," Tohru said with a smirk, "How bout if I said a Mightyeena stole my breakfast?"

"Just...go take inventory or something. Or go drink a slush. Just do SOMETHING! Please?" Saint asked, putting on her biggest doe face, making sure to show a little ass-clevage.

"Meh, I guess I could since you asked so nicely," Tohru sighed and went into the aisles, making sure to take the magazine with him.

Saint just huffed and went back to watching for customers. After a few minutes, she rested her head on her claw out of boredom. It wasn't the most exciting thing in the world to do, just tending the register all day erry day at this little shop, but it paid the bills. However, just as she thought no one was gonna come today, a familiar Doduo walked through the door and stared at some of the many snacks that were sold there. She recognized him, or them, immediately from the way both head's eyes were slightly bloodshot.

She cleared her throat in an effort to get "their" attention. One of the heads just kept looking through the snacks, but the other one glanced in her direction. Once it realized that she was looking at them, the head pecked at the other one and they both turned completely around to face her.

"Alright Neckbird," Saint said, tapping her claws on the counter, "What are you here for this time?"

The heads looked at each other before looking back to her.

"Oh ya know, the usual," Neckbird's left head said, "Munchies suck but what can ya do right? Also, have you forgot already? I'm Neckbird number J and he's Neckbird number B."

The head on the right just nodded. Saint rubbed her face and groaned...every time Neckbird shows up its the same. They come in, stoned usually, and grab a few snacks...without paying. Its been happening since she started working here, so it was pretty much just a regular occurance at this point.

"You realize J and B aren't numbers right?" Saint asked, her face scrunched in annoyance.

"It isn't?" Neckbird J said while Neckbird B grabbed a few bags of chips from the shelf, "Well damn...anywas we got what we're here for, so later."

Neckbird started on their way out when suddenly Neckbird B started pecking on J a bit. When he turned to yell at B, B just motioned back towards Saint. J looked lost for a bit when he realized what B was trying to say, but couldn't with his beak holding the chip bags. Neckbird then backpetaled back to the counter.

"You know...we're throwing a party later at our place," Neckbird J said, "Plenty of people will be there and stuff. It'll be fun~."

Saint rolled her eyes, her cheek still resting on her claw. "I dunno." She said, knowing full well she was already going to be there with a pound of weed.

"Well whatever, do what ya want," Neckbird J said, shaking his head, "Come on B, lets get out of here."

With that, Neckbird made a hasty exit before Saint decided to stop them from taking the chips, though she wouldn't.

"Hey Tohru, you hear that? Party, let's go!" Saint called out, hopping over the counter. Her tee was tied at a knot above her stomach and her cargo pants sagged slightly, showing just a bit of ass.

"Alright, a party...but wait who's gonna watch the store?" Tohru asked as he walked from the back of the aisles, feigning interest as he adjusted his baseball cap. After that he adjusted his overshirt, which he never kept buttoned up, and his baggy shorts.

"The store can watch itself for a while," Saint said, "We have cameras set up in case anyone decides to try anything."

"We do? Since when?" Tohru asked, just now noticing the small security cams in the corners of the store.

"Since you forgot to lock up one night and it got hit," Saint said flatly, leaning forwards with her hands on her hips, "Don't think I've forgotten about that either."

Tohru sighed and shook his head in defeat. They were no stranger to store robberies, most falling flat before they start, but one managed to catch them off guard when they stepped out to get a bite to eat at the local White Forretress. When they got back, the place was a mess and the cash in the register and safe were gone. Even though it probably still would have been robbed, Saint blames him since he DID forget to close up before they went.

"Fine fine, you win," Tohru said, "We'd better catch up to Neckbird and ask where his pla-"

Tohru didn't get to finish his sentence as the door swung open. Saint spun on the spot to see who entered and immediately tensed. A few Zuruzukin entered the shop like they owned the place and immediately began to grab things. Tohru's lazy demeanor dropped slightly and was replaced with a sort of aprehension. He had a feeling something was gonna happen, and apparently so did Saint.

"Hey, can I help you with something?" Saint said to the group.

"Yeah hoe, you can start by emptying that cash register into a carry out bag," the lead Zuruzukin said, his hand sparking with energy.

Tohru swallowed a bit. This guy meant business...however Saint wasn't one to be scared by someting like this. Calmly, she leaned on the counter and stared at the Zuruzukin.

"Yeah right punk," Saint said, taunting the guy, "If you want the cash you gotta get it yourself, and my name isn't 'hoe' its Saint."

The Zuruzukin just started laughing, causing the others to stop what they were doing and laugh too. Saint just stared smugly at them.

"Haha the girls got attitude, I like that," Zuruzukin said, walking over and resting a hand on her shoulder, "Why don't ya come over to my place and we can have some fun?"

Saint glared at the Zuruzukin before shoving his hand off of her shoulder, her claws extending and flying towards the Zuruzukin's stomach. The Zuruzukin, caught off guard, groaned as the claw hit his stomach. He stumbled back slightly and clutched where he was hit. The other Zuruzukin rushed over and supported him, some glaring at Saint while the others were helping the leader.

"Slash-Caps, you ok?" one of them said, "She looked like she got you good."

"Peh, I'm ok you dumbass...something like that won't take me out that easy," the lead Zuruzukin, Slash-Caps, said, "Looks like that nothin wants to do this the hard way, get her niggas."

Saint jumped back, whipping out the bone of her dead mother, growling at the other Zuruzukin. They advanced cautiously, seeing how hard she hit Slash, making Saint back up a bit. The store wasn't the best place for a fight, not only because there wasn't much room to move but also because she didn't want to accidentally trash the place. However, it was too late to get them outside, that is unless they were thrown out, and being outnumbered like this wasn't helping the cause.

Saint didn't have much time to think as one of the Zuruzukin decided to grow a pair and lunge forwards at her. Quickly, she sidestepped him and swung the bone club as hard as she could at the attacker. The club hit him square in the back, throwing off his balance and making him topple over. Another Zuruzukin decided to get the drop on her and grabbed her from behind. She gave him a swift elbow to the side, allowing her to break free, and brought her club up to slam him upside the head with the tip.

Two more decided to join in and they rushed her at the same time. She managed to get one with her club, but the other one managed to grab it and force it away from her. Without her club, she didn't have many options but tried her best, punching and clawing at the attackers. In then end though, they managed to grab her and force her down.

"Let go of me!" Saint yelled, still attempting to kick at the Zuruzukin.

"Game over hoe," Slash-Caps said as he walked over, rearing back to slam her with his fist, "Say goodnight..."

At this point, Tohru couldn't stand by and just watch. Moving almost faster then the eye could see, he slammed into one of the Zuruzukin that were holding Saint and knocked him into Slash-Caps. There was a pale glow to him and the attack hit harder than it should have. With the same swiftness, he hit the other one holding Saint down off of her and somehow managing to send him flying through the door. She picked herself up and reached for her club a couple of feet away.

By this time, the other Zuruzukin that Saint clobbered had gotten up and went back to join Slash-Caps. Slash-Caps glared at the pair. Saint glared back and gripped her club like some sort of samurai warrior while Tohru simply stood there. Nobody made a move for a while until Slash-Caps scoffed.

"You know what? This is wack," he said, "Come on niggas, lets get out of here before the cops get here."

With that they quickly made their escape, only managing to snag a few snacks on the way out. Saint merely flipped them off as Tohru walked forwards a bit and yelled after them.

"Yeah that's right you'd better run!" he yelled, cupping his hands like a megaphone.

Saint just rolled her eyes and propped herself on the counter. It had been a while since she'd gotten into a fight like that and she was slightly winded. Tohru walked over to her and placed a hand on her back.

"You ok?" he asked.

"Yeah I'm fine, hah that was fun," Saint said, the rush of the fight still working through her system.

"That's good, for a second I thou-OW!" Tohru said, but was cut off as pain shot through his right arm, the energy wearing off and feeling the aftereffects of his own attacks.

"Huh? Whats wrong?" Saint said, turning the tables on him.

"Its n-nothing, ungh, I guess I put a bit too much into that last attack...stupid recoil," Tohru grunted, cradling the affected arm.

Saint examined the arm and felt it. It didn't appear broken and as she tested it she didn't think it was fractured either, despite his wincing. She shook her head and walked towards the door.

"Well, come on," Saint said, putting her club back wherever she keeps it and adjusting her pants, "We've got a party to get to."

Tohru just sighed and walked out of the store with her, knowing that it was pointless to argue. He made sure to lock the door behind him this time and they both walked down the street that lead to Neckbird's place. They only hoped they wouldn't be late with the fight delaying them...

To Be Continued...

* * *

A/N: That's chapter one. What will happen at the party? Is this the last we'll see of Slash-Caps? Stay tuned for more chapters!


End file.
